Trap-Inception-Redemption

I mess up a lot. I'm a huge klutz and trip over everything. I forget stuff at home and have to have my parents drive back and get it and drop it off again. I am selfish and act horrible to people all the time, I am so sorry for that. And within this realization of how much I fail it's easy for me to fall into the trap of condemnation in which Satan plants those deadly seeds of inadequacy and worthlessness into my head. But then I wake up and it's all a dream. The more I get to know God the more I begin to realize how redeeming He is in every single mistake that I can possibly make. That 2000 years ago He knew of the faults I commit today and forgave them and justified them as well as tomorrow's and forever deemed me loved as his son

"Again, the gift of God is not like the result of the one man's sin: The judgment followed one sin and brought condemnation, but the gift followed many trespasses and brought justification." Romans 5:16

Mary and Martha

I have a very long to-do list that spans the next couple weeks. It feels really good when I check something off then I look at the remaining overwhelming compilation of work and get anxious. I worry a lot. I walk around school everyday wondering what I should be doing and if I'm meant to be in a certain class or studying a certain subject or interacting with certain people. And at the end of the day I'm simply left questioning trying to figure out God's plan for me.

Lately I have been reminded how not glorifying to God that anxiety and mindset is as I neglect opportunities to faithfully and wholeheartedly wait at His feet and serve Him in everything I do without any worry to whether it is part of some great plan for me. I really feel like Martha in Luke 10:38-42 who puts too much time and effort and attention into doing things that she might think would be pleasing to Jesus instead of stopping and simply listening to Him and delighting in His presence in her home. Too many times do I too try to decipher what God wants for me forgetting the fact that I am man not God and neglecting the opportunity to love dwelling in His presence. After all, it is delighting in God that brings Him great glory

Time to be Mary

here's a song that's been on my heart lately

A Father's Heart

It's my dad's birthday today and I am in awe of God's ability to continuously teach me what true love is through my dad's actions towards me. I am so thankful that my earthly father can remind me of my heavenly father. It's crazy because the more I think about my dad the more I realize soon that I will become a father and appreciate the seemingly little responsibilities that my dad does that are actually grand statements of what love really is. When I wake up at 6:30am and drive my child to zero period every morning for three years or help him practice shooting a basketball for hours in the backyard or buy him that favorite toy he's been talking about for months, I hope I'll always remember my dad but more importantly that love is sacrifice as shown through the sacrifice of Jesus Christ for all of our sins.



praise God for good dads



aside: I am en route to my quarter life crisis