Matthew 14:22-33

Jesus told me to "come" so I stepped out of the boat and placed my foot as gently as possible on the seemingly unsettled surface. This is insane. The wind feels like sharp blades as it stings my skin and tries to tear through my clothing. Raindrops take on the weight of little stones as they pelt me like I angered them. But I look straight ahead and see Jesus, my teacher, shepherd, and protector. I keep walking and with every step I take the ice cold water numbs my feet and sends chills resonating to the very tips of the hairs on my body. I have to squint in order to avoid flying debris from piercing my eyes.

And then Fear strikes. In a split second the chills compounded with the wind and rain all conglomerate into a single composite force of doubt that forces my vision from my Lord to the raging waters around me. "Oh my gosh, what the freak is going on?" I ask myself as my parasympathetic nervous system triggers my fight or flight response and my heart innately begins to flee. I am deathly distressed. All I can see are the waves. Wow they are so big and I can't see any end to them. I remember Jesus reassuring me, "Take courage. It is I. Don't be afraid," but my gaze remains fixed on my surroundings and I begin to sink. I have just witnessed this man feed five thousand people with five loaves of bread and two fish. A couple of chapters ago I have seen him heal the sick and resurrect a synagogue ruler's daughter, but doubt still fills my heart.

I get swallowed up by everything that is burdening me. "How am I going to make any money and support my family with this GPA? Is med school still an option? Man church is so hard to serve at. I feel like I am stretched so thin ministering to others. I hurt so many people. I am tired." But the Holy Spirit is good enough to intercede on my behalf and allow me to let out the cry, "Lord, save me!" And immediately Jesus reaches out his hand to deliver me. He rebukes me, out of love, for my lack of faith and proceeds to take me to safety and calm the storms within me. I am in awe and I begin to worship as I am reminded of his teaching and encouragement: "Come to me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

He loves me and wants to disciple me and I am reminded to find peace and joy in that